Impartiality Vs. Self-Realization.

I ignore my own words
Act as if it's all under
Control
But it clearly isn't
Turn away go into that
Void
That dark place
I keep telling myself that I'm doing it
But I know I'm not
I know I can't
Losing some battle
I probably shouldn't even be in
Don't worry
Patience is a
Virtue
I tell myself
Day in and
Day out
Yet here I sit in this
Uneasy place
Lying to myself
Lying to you
For once, maybe you can't see
Right through